Stray Dog Strut
I have been getting an increasing number of people complaining that we have not posted for some time. That is, two people have complained. But since that makes up the majority of our readers, I shall go ahead and post.

1) I have acquired a sore throat and cough that I can only assume are the first signs of the "black death," and am sitting at home posting intsead of doing work.

2) It has been pointed out by the Matt that this site has been largely powered by "sexual frustration and fear of women." Most of the posts have been inspired by particular setbacks in this area. However, as this is no longer the case, I shall have to find other subject mattter.

3) I remain one paper and one thesis away from completing my Master's degree. I have reached a point where I don't really care that much about either of them, and have lost the initiative to do actual work. However, I have not gotten funding this year, so it is somewhat imperative that I finish as soon as possible. I am considering three things: 1) staying here and completing my phD - if i get funding next year, that is, 2) going somewhere else and completing a phD, possibly in Asian religions rather than philosophy, 3) bounty hunting. I am beginning to question whether or not I want to actually go into academia, and I am once again considering taking a year off to go do random things.

4) In other news, I have a sweet new two bedroom apartment all to myself, so I have an office, which is awesome. Perhaps I will put pictures of it up one day, but today it is very messy.

5) Finally, here is a link to the best video ever.

[No one's going to take us alive]

[End Communication]
- posted by Russell @ 10:42 AM

 
Chris Onstad is a fucking genius.
Baths only.

[End Communication]
- posted by Russell @ 10:10 PM

 
Fuck Everything, I'm Doing Five Blades
I'm not sure which is more absurd; that they have developed a razor with five blades, or that I will probably go to the store and buy it.

[End Communication]
- posted by Russell @ 4:11 PM

 
Holiday
My colleague and I recently decided that, in light of modern commercialism of the holiday season and its subsequent loss of meaning, we shall henceforth replace Christmas with Batman. No more baby Jesus or Santa Claus or reindeer or presents or Christmas Carols or egg nog. No Robin either. Just Batman.

Batman does not distribute presents to children. He distributes justice with a cold hand.

That is all. We hope you will join us for next year for Batman.

[Merry Batman to you]
- posted by Russell @ 2:56 PM

 
Possibilities
Several good things have happened. I finished all my grading, and I got an advisor for my thesis next semester, which will be on Whitehead. Now I just have to write the paper that I should have turned in twelve hours ago, and I'm done for the semester.

After a time spent trying to be in a relationship and failing, I got fed up and decided that I didn't actually want a relationship. Shortly thereafter, I found an extra toothbrush next to my sink. Does someone know what is going on? Seriously. There is diet Coke in my fridge. I'm not really clear on how this happened. Why am I involved in any way with feminine products?

And of course, as soon as I am in a relationship, the amazing model-hot other girl who I've had a crush on all semester, the girl with whom I never really thought I'd have a chance in hell, gives me her number.

No, I'm not going to call it, but why does this happen now?

Everyone always says that when you are in a relationship, you act more confident and therefore more girls will like you. I didn't actually think it would happen, though. Shit - if I'm not going to see the ladyfriend that day, I might not even shower. And this attracts girls?

I give up. I'm not going to try to understand anymore.

[End Communication]
- posted by Russell @ 7:25 PM

 
Why do all these homosexuals keep sucking my cock?
Ok fine, so I am going to post again. I got tired of looking at the site during my daily routine of interwebbing and seeing a huge poorly written thing about Whitehead. Just to clarify, I realize that no one intends the literal meaning of most of the things they say. I did not mean to snap at anyone who was attempting to cheer me up, and I apologize if anyone felt that way. I just found the expression “everything is going to be alright” to be a convenient device for looking at some things.

A number of people I know are in various states of crisis and deciding what to do with themselves and whatnot. I suppose this is the sort of thing that happens upon reaching your mid twenties (sweet baby jesus how did that happen). My advice here is simple: do not get sodomized in half by a horse. If you have not done that, things may still suck. But at least you have not been sodomized in half by a horse.

[End Communication]
- posted by Russell @ 11:04 PM

 
This shit is getting out of hand.
I will address the second criticism first. I think my friend's disagreement with point 6 is due largely to my failure to clearly define my terms. When I say that some things suck for all time, I mean to indicate that the past cannot be changed. In other words, if the past is -5, and the present is +15, we are not left with an overall +10 that somehow melts various experiences into one collective experience. We are in agreement that the past can be reconciled somewhat by incorporating it into the present in as positively as possible. However, the present which incorporates this past is a different thing from the past. (As Carl noted) So, it is not that the past continues to suck or to hurt, it is that the fact that the past sucked will never change. Thus, the fact that some things have sucked (the past) will remain true for all time, although it will be replaced by other things (the present/future) which do not suck so much. So the “Everything” must only apply to current experience, and not past experience. We can reinterpret the past to make it better, but we can only do this in the present. As my friend criticizes the possible counter argument, that does not make it so the past never hurt. No takesies-backsies.

Indeed, evil can cause some good. The example of my friend growing closer to a friend, for one. Another, dear to all our hearts, is Pinkerton. Also Batman. These were not only born of suffering, but also could not have come been nearly as great without it. The suffering is included in them and in Whitehead's terms, “transmuted” into something better. We can make the best of things, but this is only because they were bad in the first place. But making the best of them does not transform them into good things. As Whitehead says, at least on my reading, we do not destroy evil; we mitigate it with good.

Does Batman ever decide that the death of his parents as a positive thing because it caused him to become Batman, saving countless other lives? I doubt it. Emancipation from slavery might not have been possible if slavery had never occurred, but that does not mean that slavery was a good thing. If you starve a man, and then give him some crackers so that he can thoroughly enjoy eating more than he ever has in his life, this does not justify his starvation. But without this starvation, he would not have enjoyed his crackers as much.

With this in mind, let us reexamine the phrase “Everything will be alright.”
I will attempt a more generous interpretation. I do indeed appreciate the effort to be nice, insofar as it evinces a genuine concern. But while sympathy may be implied, it is not made obvious. A simple "that sucks" is sympathy, a "sorry that things are not good." An "Everything is going to be alright" is an attempt to cheer someone up.

In saying “Everything is going to be alright,” one seems to urge that the present situation is rendered ok because of the future potential within it; that your problem will be solved. It comes off as dismissive rather than sympathetic – in a way, it almost makes light of the problem.

“Everything is going to be alright” is something you might say to a child who has spilled his extreme cookie juice or whatever it is that the children drink these days. It is appropriately used when the problem is solvable. You do not say it to a man who has lost his child in a horrible accident. My situation is somewhere between these two examples, probably closer to the former. The problem, in my case, is a series of events occurring between the years 1991 and 2005. In some respects my problem is solvable and relatively minor; there remains plenty of potential for positive experience. But there are some things which I experienced that just plain sucked, such that I do not see how they could be made up for. My future experience may indeed be alright and the past, as my friend puts it, may stop hurting. Nevertheless, If Jebus descends and apologizes for the mixup, I would flip him off. Something that might have been can now never be. A loss is inherently unable to be turned into a gain. If it was able to be solved, loss wouldn't be real and there would be no such thing as tragedy. Perhaps there is a gain at some point, but that is something different from the loss.

I suppose that one might make the case that my youthful experiences have led me to a career that will ultimately be more rewarding than many other choices. Either that or I'll just slowly grow more and more neurotic. Perhaps I now have a better understanding of things because of my experiences. Maybe if I had spent more time chasing girls, my grades would not have been as good, and I would not be in grad school. Perhaps some girl would have tricked me into going to law school so I could buy extreme cookie juice for the children she tricked me into having. Or I could be in jail, or have several venereal diseases, or both. While my present situation is not the best of all possibilities, it is far from the worst.

Nevertheless, while I am fully aware of the fact that the past cannot be changed, and that dwelling on it is not the least bit productive, I cannot help but continue to wish that the past had been different. I still cannot stop regretting my past actions or lack of action; or, if I shouldn't blame myself, I can still regret the circumstances that caused my actions. Perhaps the past will stop hurting, as my friend puts it. This still does not give me back the the things I have lost, and though I have perhaps gained countless other things, these things do not seem worth it. There are certain things that will not ever be alright, so the only way I can get past them is to stop trying to make them alright.

So to restate, “Everything is going to be alright” implies that everything will be all right, and does not seem to adequately capture this loss. It does not acknowledge that tragedy occurs.

But this reading still is not fair. It is reasonable to translate it into “While your problem cannot be resolved, and that sucks, it is still possible and probable that you can move on in such a way that allows past hurt to stop hurting and your further experiences to be tolerable or even enjoyable.”

Let us consider what I think is the most favorable interpretation of this phrase. We should consider that present suffering is oftentimes made more bearable when one believes that it is going to end. For example, a person may be able to stand a dentist's drill because he or she knows that the painful experience will soon be over. A positive attitude in serious illness, I am told, actually does increase one's chances of getting better. So, the conveyance of this type of positive attitude is most likely the goal of the “Everything is going to be alright” or the “There is a girl out there just for you.”

But belief is not really something one can choose. And it is especially difficult to cultivate such a positive belief when one's previous attempts to do so have repeatedly, with a few rare exceptions, have been met largely with failure in various forms. Promises of 'a girl just for you' who will arrive after some indefinite period of time, predictions based largely on nothing and stand contrary to experience, cannot really be taken seriously.

So, to conclude this section: trying to convey a positive attitude in trite superficial ways is essentially infuriating to one whose main problem is the inability to cultivate a positive attitude. It is not unlike trying to feed a starving man some plastic crackers. It perhaps conveys sympathy, but in a very strange way. While it no doubt conveys good intentions, it also conveys a lack of understanding. Not that I expect anyone to solve my problems for me.

And on point 3) The policy of not dating two ladies at one time was adopted largely due to the predictions of confusion for a simple man, along with the fact that such an option has never presented itself, at least not in any obvious way. The policy has never actually stifled any possibilities, and it will be violated upon the next available opportunity.

That being said, I probably won't post anymore for a while. I need to stop thinking about this, as this is one thing where thinking about it does not help. This is particularly difficult, because thinking is my first inclination towards any problem I encounter.
- posted by Russell @ 12:33 AM